I am on social media everyday.
I think social media is good for a few things such as brand building, promoting, and there are some good quotes and feel good thoughts posted. You can keep up to date with what your friends and family are doing, help to bring awareness on certain issues around the world… and well, that’s about it.
When you pose for a photo, generally you smile. Even if you feel sad or alone, you smile, and when people see that photo they think, “Wow, she looks so happy.”
Social media is about capturing one moment in time, or that’s what it used to be about. Now it’s about creating a moment for social media. I read a quote the other day that said, “If you don’t catch a moment on social media, does that mean it didn’t happen?”
Social media reminds me everyday that I have an ego: I want more followers, more sponsors, more of this and more of that, but in all actuality, I have everything I need. I have made many mistakes in my life, one of them being that because I rarely feel satisfied, not often enough do I stop to realize the beauty in my life. Marriage takes work, and distance from my wife is a struggle. My soccer career has been hard, really hard for years. I miss my family every single day (the one in Germany and the ones in Canada and the USA), and I have moments of utter happiness, and moments where I feel like I’ll never be enough, but social media only captures what we choose to share, and those are generally the happy snippets of life. What social media rarely captures is the day-to-day reality. From now on I hope to give you a more honest look into my life. It’s a lot of moments of repetition, discipline, recovery, reading; some might consider it pretty boring, but what I want is to be as real as possible.
My grandmother Inga, who was 97 years old, just passed away. What I loved about her is that you knew without a doubt what mattered in her life. She had photos of family all over the house, every email any of us ever sent her, postcards from around the world, and she even had her kids’ drawings from when they were kids. Her pride came from all of us. I once told her I might get into politics, and she said, “Look at that, a future Prime-Minister.” She didn’t know how to think small when it came to her family, and none of us ever wanted to let her down. My other grandmother, who is almost 90, has the same core values and priorities. We became roommates right after my grandfather passed away. My family was in Indonesia, but I wanted to be in Canada to try and get a soccer scholarship, so I returned without my family to Canada and moved in with my grandmother who put on a brave face everyday, having just lost the love of her life, and she spoiled me rotten with her cooking and her love. I still call her Roomie. She would have done for anyone else in our family what she did for me. She has always been and continues to be the glue on my mom’s side of the family. There is something about that generation. They are not wasteful. They cherish every person in their life. They love talking about the weather, and there is always time to visit. They don’t pull out a phone to put something online: they let the moment sink in.
I’m not suggesting that stopping social media altogether is the answer, although there have been a few times when I have deactivated my accounts. However, I think it’s important to know what your values are and what you stand for, and don’t be deceived by all the social media that surrounds us. The photos online are alluring, but rarely do you see the entire story behind the Instagram post or tweet. In reality, nothing that is ever worth it comes easily.
I have started to put a cap on the time I’m online. I stalk my wife;), my family, my friends, and then I fill out my daily wellness journal and do my German Duolingo (Language App). After that, I put my phone down. Life is too short to be obsessed with everyone else’s life, so I’m going to try and make sure I make the best of mine.